Fathers

Someone asked me this week what my favorite part of my job as a trip leader is. It's not the location, though Alaska is unlike any place I have ever been. It's not the activity, though every week I get to hike, bike, and run with sled dogs. It's not the money, though I make enough money to have everything I need and some things I want.

You want to know what it is? It's the opportunity to facilitate family memories.

I work with families most every week. For many, this is the only family vacation they will go on this year. As well, many of these families are incredibly busy and generally don't spend as much time together as they would like (especially from the parents' perspective).

So, I see my role as helping them have a great vacation where they enjoy each other and create lasting memories.

One of the rewards I have found personally in this is the opportunity to watch fathers and their kids.

I want to be a Dad. More than anything else, I want to be a Dad. Not sure why. I just do.

After watching some great dads these last few weeks, that feeling has intensified. I see qualities in these men that I want to have when that day comes for me. Let me give a couple examples:

Dan stood out from the other parents on the trip. He was much older than the other parents who had kids about the same age as his son (14 years old). But it wasn't just his age that made him stand out. He was actively interested in the other kids on the trip. When other parents had quickly given up on giving a listening ear to some of the younger kid's LONG stories during dinner, Dan listened excitedly. He asked questions, laughed at their painful jokes, and always smiled. It was like he wanted to have another kid. He was great with the young ones.

And his son was the best. Travis was such a nice, responsible, and balanced kid. He was good with the other kids, the adults, and his parents. Where many 14 year olds ignored their parents, he was excited to spend a week with them. They had a great relationship.

I was impressed with Dan and the job he had done with Travis. Then I heard the news that shocked me. Travis wasn't Dan's biological son. Dan and his wife had adopted him from her sister. Dan's sister-in-law had had severe problems with drugs and when Travis was eight years old she was forced to give him up.

Talk about tough.

But you could see in Dan a man who always wanted to be a father whether he would have kids of his own or not. He enjoyed and appreciated kids. When the opportunity presented itself, he jumped on it. He never took it for granted.

I could see from the get-go that Joe was an avid cyclist. He had all the gear and even brought his own pedals for the trip. These guys make me worry. They are usually intense and uninterested in the rest of the group. They are here to ride, some times at the expense of their family.

But not Joe. Yes, he was an avid cyclist who rode quite often. But he was here to spend time with his kids.

His kids had latched onto some other kids in the group almost immediately. The kids on this trip did everything together. They hiked together, rode in the van together, and ate dinner together. They rarely spent time with their family.

For many parents, this was a dream. The kids were making friends, enjoying the vacation, and they were having some together time with their spouse.

But I asked Joe on day three of the trip if he wanted to see his kids more. He was reluctant. He said he was happy as long as they were happy. This was true. He loved his kids. He wanted them to be happy, but just as much, he wanted to be with them as much as possible.

When there are many dads out there who don't appreciate the role they play in their children's life, it's nice to see guys like this who don't take a moment for granted. They love their kids and they love being their dad.

This week I get to share Alaska with my Dad. I'm excited to show him where I've been playing. But even more so, I'm excited to spend some time with my Dad. He's a good one.